The Man I Never Thought I’d Be

He clutched the styrofoam plate so tightly it cracked.  All the pancakes you can eat along with instant hashbrowns, sausage and weak coffee.

He felt queasy, clammy, edgy.  He hated this part.  Just make it through today.  The nausea was the worst.  Okay, just make it through breakfast.  Try to eat something.  His mouth was too dry.  Okay, have some coffee.  Something to hold on to.

He wondered what she was doing this morning.  He’d watched her at the coffee shop and waited for his moment, the moment he knew would come.  When she’d leave her table for one minute, maybe two.  She returned to find her laptop gone.  It was too easy for him.  An older laptop; even so, he knew it would get him what he needed for the night.

All actions have consequences, he knew.  The older laptop could only mean she didn’t have the money for a newer one.  She was using coffee shop internet, was that to be out in the world or because she didn’t have money for a home connection?  What did his actions mean for her?

He blocked out these thoughts.

I don’t want to be…this man I never thought I’d be.

 

10 thoughts on “The Man I Never Thought I’d Be

  1. It’s a bit disturbing how much some people will try to tear away from those around them in order to meet the needs they can’t fulfill within themselves or openly seek from others.
    And the less I think about the laptop, the more disturbing it becomes.

    Liked by 1 person

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